I was a Dictator to my own body for a long time. I smoked cigarettes for 39 years and never once did I ask my lungs, heart or skin if it was a good idea. I lived in the ivory tower of my own mind and dictated what my body needed to deal with. Not only cigarettes but sugary food, no exercise and limited sleep were forced onto the population of my body and my mind fully justified all that with “that’s what everyone does.
Hellerwork, Chiropractic, Yoga, regular consistent bodywork all contributed to my becoming aware of what my body needed and wanted to thrive. My internal Dictator has become the Benevolent Caretaker that has me exercising daily, reading labels of food and doing what I can to take care of my internal, cellular population.
With a clear mind and healthy body I can see now how my Dictator was stopping me from feeling how unconsciously sad, lonely and hopeless I had been. I was covering up those feelings of “not belonging” and “not enough”. The frustrations and grief were kept in unconscious place. Yet those feelings showed up in my health, posture and outlook to life.
In the world of recovery from cravings of drugs and alcohol it is said “you are only as sick as your secrets”. My secrets were to myself; how I really felt. So I smoked, drank and ate to keep the feelings suppressed.
Paying attention to the constituents of your body may surprise you. We all have secrets
