Emotional Connection

My phone rings, demanding some attention, as phones do.

“Hello, this is Dr. Dohn, what can I do for you?”

            “Okay, well, I wish I could help you over the phone but that never seems to work.  As important as texting and social media are, it doesn’t take the place of eye-to-eye and person-to-person examination and treatment.  “In person” is definitely needed to have you feel better. Tomorrow at 3:00 will be perfect.”

            “Thank you, see you then.”

My office is empty, except for me, and now it’s quiet.  I have turned off the Pandora music that sounds like elevator music.   The 4 fan-lights in the middle of the room are on.  The blinds are slightly open allowing in afternoon sun.  I am in my stocking feet, dress pants with my monogrammed grey business shirt on.  It’s 2:30 in the afternoon.  I am at my stand-up desk on my MacBook.  My thoughts are filled with how and what should I write.  I know that self-help books and written wisdom by themselves do not work.  I know that email information and even texting, tweets and facebook with inspirational messages do very little for changing behaviors, relieving pain or making dreams come true.  If written words would lead someone to actually being with another person, acknowledging and disappearing their fear of taking action, or exercising or changing eating habits then all those self help books would be a good investment.  But they do not work.  Or rarely, at best.  There is an extended sequence from learning words in the head to embodying knowledge into our being.  Embodying knowledge into action does not happen with learning words.  Everybody knows the words to losing weight, exercising and meeting people.  Very few actually turn those words into action. Today’s blog is about the importance of eyeball to eyeball contact for improving our health and our lives.

We need to look into someone’s eyes, smell their breath, maybe even touch them with a handshake or more and feel what they are feeling to trust them.

My favorite bumper sticker saying is “No one cares what you know until they know that you care.”

On-line dating, self help sites, even yoga and movement classes are like going to a restaurant and eating the menu.  It’s not so nourishing.  So what in the world can I write about?  “Please stop reading this and go find someone to talk to, some Meeting to go to, some Seminar or yoga studio to attend, some Doctor’s office to make an appointment with?”

            Hmmmmmm

            The phase, “Physician heal thyself” refers to the notion that in the depths of our healing we need to be with others that have been through the same experiences.  This is why combat vets only talk to other combat vets about their experiences if they want to get beyond PTSD.  And why alcoholics only talk to other sober alcoholics if they want to learn how to get beyond the phenomena of craving alcohol.  If obesity or high blood pressure or heart disease or chronic pain are knocking on your door, I suggest you find a Doctor who has dealt with these specific issues herself for the best results in recovery and treatment.

            A great on-line resource these days is www.curablehealth.com .  And after you check it out you will need to find a real Human Being Practitioner that has benefitted from whatever experience or pain may be troubling you.  Look into her eyes, shake her hand, listen, discover trust and feel the authentic intention of emotional connection.

            My phone rings again.  Not really a ring but that music tone that insists on attention.

            “Hello, this is Doctor Dohn, what can I do for you?”

Dr. Jim Dohn Hellerwork, DC

www.thingsarelookinguptoday.com

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